"This is real; this is me. I am exactly where I'm supposed to be."
Demi Lovato sings this catchy tune in Disney Channel's Camp Rock. That songs plays over and over in my head when I know something is meant to be. There are times when I get onstage and this song beings playing--the rush from seeing the crowd and hoping I know my lines, and then I remember.
As I remember Demi's voice, I realize how important it is for me to do what I love. One cannot let anything hold them back. It is my latest dream to attend a summer camp through NYFA (New York Film Academy).
I was looking through my latest issue of Seventeen when I saw the advertisement. I usually pass up cheesy "be famous, NOW!" ads, but this one caught my eye for some reason. As soon as I saw it, I knew it was what I wanted. I ventured on the website and did what any fool would do, try to secure myself a spot. In doing so, I realized I had to put a $500 down payment. I thought 'okay, not too bad,' but then I saw it: $3,000 price tag, which did not include another $2700 for room and board.
I wanted to faint.
As much as I try to pretend to want a "practical" career, I cannot ignore my passion for acting. I've always been told I'm talented at the craft, but is that enough? Every now and then I have a friend who is willing to challenge me, one that will look me in the face and ask 'do you really think you're good enough?' As much as it breaks my heart to hear those words, I must consider them. Am I going to be good enough to make it in the big time?
My best friend from my childhood recently completed a series of private lessons from Barbizon Modeling. She called me and gave me every last detail about the clothes worn in the shows, the cute escorts that lead her out, and the new walks she had learned. On the day of her graduation, she had changed.
Just by hearing the sound of her voice, I knew something was different--she was growing up. She hadn't always matured as fast as I, but when I heard it, I knew.
Everyday, I pray hoping the world of modeling will not harden her as it had many 'good girls.' As I pray for her, I must consider myself, what is going to happen to me? What if I spend my whole life trying to make it big, and nothing happens, then what kind of life will I have I lived? I remember once in second grade when we were forced to watch the high school plays, seeing my brother onstage and knowing at that moment, it was all I could have wanted.
Maybe I won't make it big; maybe I won't make it into NYFA summer camp, but at least I'll know I did everything I could do to get it. How are we ever supposed to get what we want in life if we don't take it? No one's going to waltz up and hand us a dream.
[As a side note, I did not go to acting campy, but instead ended up spending this summer on a mission trip to Costa Rica. It was the best summer of my high school experience. Always remember that there are things unseen.]
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