I haven't posted for awhile. I decided to take a few steps away from myself, and stop thinking, and start doing. I knew I had to let go of the one thing I held onto so dearly-- writing.
The funny thing is--I learned that sometimes life is not about doing. This past month, I did a great job of doing. I saw more people, spent more money, and went many places. So this afternoon when my mom told me I'd be staying home all weekend, I was so relieved that I went to the library to get some books to lose myself in.
You see, sometimes we begin to think what we are, what we are doing is not enough. That we should all become Renaissance men or be extremely cultured. Some people like to find their worth in the things they buy, but not me. I like to measure worth by experience, knowledge, understanding. These are all very good things, but when is it okay to ever believe that I am more or less than I actually am? When is it necessary to question my own worth because of (lack off) accomplishments?
On Sunday, we had a guest preacher at church. He discussed how the angels cannot look upon the face of God (Isaiah 6). Though it would be nice to be an angel, they will never know the joy will we once know. One day, we will look in God's face, and He will call to us saying, "Well done, my good and faithful servant" (Matthew 25)...Or at least that's what I hope He'll be saying to me ;)
