Baby, It's Cold Outside

There's a really obnoxious Taylor Swift song that says, "I don't know what I want so don't ask me; I'm still trying to figure it out."

And there is my entire college experience summed up in one line of a terrible pop song.

Last night, I was running errands with a good friend of mine. On our way back to the dorms, we were all discussing what kind of relationships we wanted. We both decided that right now, at this point in our lives, we're not really sure if we want any sort of relationship...or maybe we do.

Maybe it's the eggnog, or the romantic plots in every Christmas movies, but everyone gets lonely when it's cold outside. Not an annoying, I-just-need-someone-to-love-me lonely. It's not desperate or even that depressing, but there becomes a longing in all of us.

College kids everywhere are acknowledging "cuddle weather." Everyone I've talked to lately wants a warm body in their bed, not necessarily sexually, just having someone there. There's less to do, and everyone just wants to stay in, but no one wants to do it alone. The paradox is, though, how are we going to be who we need to be if we refuse to be by ourselves?

This winter, I'm fighting cuddle weather. I'm done wasting my time, energy, and efforts. Sure, I'll bake cookies and watch Netflix, but I'll do them alone. Not because I'm an "I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T" woman or I hate men, I just love myself.

Wednesday night when I was trying to make a decision, a friend asked me, what would the man of your dreams do? Because the thing is, it's not about changing to be ready for the person you're going to be with, but becoming the person you want to be when you're in a relationship.

What does your final destination look like? Who do you want to be when you're at that point in your life? Allow yourself to become that person.

Love yourself first.

My senior year of high school, I wrote a blog about filling empty spaces and what that leads to. Read it here