Onto the Next One

I wish it could just be simple, like a retro pop song, "I want you to want me." Boom. End of story. We all live happily ever after. But it is never really like that, is it?

After the occurence of some unfortunate circumstances Friday night, I decided to spend Saturday night  relaxing with a sorority sister and luckily, John Tucker Must Die was on TV. In the movie, three of John's exes aim to ruin his life by causing him to fall in love with a no-name new girl and then used her to hurt him. Even after breaking John's heart like he broke theirs, the girls did not really gain anything that he owned them. His next girlfriend(s), though? They received the honesty and respect that the exes had fought for.

One of the most devastating and fulfilling experiences in life is seeing someone or something thrive after moving on from you.

Right before high school graduation, the only guy I had ever really cared about got into a functional and happy relationship with someone who wasn't me. Last time I checked, they were getting pretty serious. At first, I didn't understand why he had already got his happy ending and I hadn't.

Now I realize that we all deserve a happy ending. Just because someone cannot give you what you need doesn't mean that either of you lack the ability to find someone who makes you happy. In the game of life, things don't work out, and hearts get broken.

The truth is, though, everyone in our life is here to teach us something. He taught me that sometimes you have to slow down and take a deep breathe. I was able to show him that there was an entire world out there, begging him to experience it. In that relationship, I thought I did everything right, but I didn't get to reap the benefits of it--the next girl did.

Sometimes, we teach people lessons not for our own good but for the next step in their lives.

During "sophomore pursuit" on my chapter's sisterhood retreat, my pledge class talked about what it meant to be a sophomore and how proud we were of the newest initiated class. WE recruited them, and I can only hope that the class they recruit is even better than they were.

Perhaps it is just another part of growing up, but bettering my organizations and the people in my life has begun to mean so much more to me than making a name for myself. When you make a commitment to a person or an organization, you are deciding to live for something greater than yourself. Sometimes that means allowing them to thrive without you.

We plant seeds, but we don't always get to see them grow. We make plans, but we don't always get to see them come to fruition.

I look at the virtually brand new facilities that my college offers that alumni tuition paid for. I look at the people I care about and how the failures and successes in their past relationships have allowed them to be the wonderful people they are today. I look at my sorority and at how much my chapter has grown because of the officers and sisters before me.

Watching an organization or an ex flourish without you can be sad...at first. However, once we accept that we played a role in betterment of something, I think we can find closure. And isn't that all we are really looking for? A reason to move onto something better? Something that someone else prepared for us?